Results are back and I'm upset of course. But being upset doesn't change anything. You know? I really really hate to cry because that shows how weak you are and how lousy you are at handling stress. So, I'm gonna stop this emo nonsense. For now, I just have to keep studying and keep the momentum going. I need to pick myself up and stay positive!

I really miss the days when I'm genuinely happy and laughing like a ding dong everyday. So, I think I kinda lost myself and it's time to bring myself back. Kbye.

I feel exceptionally good today after attending church coz it felt like the burden I had been hiding in my heart had finally been surrendered to the Lord. Like phewwwww. This afternoon was quite screwed coz I have no study mood at all. 0%. And I felt like crap seriously. Like why aren't I doing anything it's not like I scored tremendously well for MYEs. And during worship, I cried coz I couldn't take the exam stress anymore. I felt so sick of studying and yada yada. Thank God for Kelly that prayed for me I'm back to normal once again. =D I really like the phrase " God is in control of everything". I really really want to pass my MYEs but if I didn't I'm confident to say that I'll be minimally upset now because I know what I want may not be what God wants. All I need to know is that God has a plan for me and I'll just have to leave everything to Him after putting in my best. Finally a load off my chest.

It's also very nice to tell your troubles to claudia sometimes coz she's always there to listen. Except at times when she has a sian face. LOL. Thank God for the people He has placed in my life who's always there to listen to me whenever I need someone to pour out my troubles too.

Oh well, 4 more months to FREEDOM for about a year. And I shall persevere on till I see the seeds I sow turn into sweet smelling passion fruits. No more rotten fruits and feeling upset over MYEs. Im past that stage. HAHAHA. =D Bye.

I feel so disappointed that all the effort and hardwork I had put in during the June Holidays have produced nothing. I was aiming for at least a D or C for everything and now, I think I might just fail everything. Like come on man, not like I was playing like some slacker during the holiday. Please Lord, I just need to pass all my subjects or maybe Math and Chem coz I really put in my 101% to study those 2 subjects. D= It sucks to have put in so much effort and producing nothing. So much for the efforts to allow ourselves to persevere on by writing 'Study for fruits'. It's like quite funny now to think of it coz where are the fruits seriously? Rotten fruits I suppose.

And also I'm so irritated with my stupid nose that is always having infection. Like it will be super painful at least once a month? And then I'll need an MC to see the doctor regarding my nose and it's a vicious cycle coz I have 7 MCs this year already all related to a flu and fever or a diarrhea.
-.- And now Im on some long term medication to spray some medicine into my nose everyday and hopefully my nose will never ever get an infection again. =D

I've also developed a new habit of studying everyday. Once I never study, I'll feel super guilty. YAY good change. For now, I'll pray hard that my efforts would bear a little fruit and let me just pass. PLEASE.